Yours jokes
Dentist: “This will hurt a little.”
Patient: “OK.”
Dentist: “I’m having an affair with your wife!”
Mommy, Mommy! Are we vampires?
Shut up and drink your soup before it clots!
Say "I hop in this:".
I made you eat your peas! 🤦
When you ask your mom for candy but you grab from the wrong drawer...
Your mom is so fat, when she asked, "What gift will I get?" Abuela from Encanto said, "Definitely Taco Bell!" 🌮🔔
Memes
Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Your ass is clean because Randy won’t stop liking [it].
What do you say when an emo cuts themself?
"Like your cut, G."
Why do you not have milk with your Oreos?
Daddy never came back with the milk.
Your forehead is so big it makes Megamind's head look small.
A guy asked me what I do for a living.
Now I'm not old enough to get a job, so I said nothing. He asked me again, so I said, "Your wife!" The guy goes to slap me, but his wife is standing right there. She instead slapped me and said, "You swore not to tell!"
A guy ate your hairline because it reminded him of a McDonald's fry!
Wanna see something dark?
Close your eyes.
Your birth certificate is like an apology from the condom factory...
Your nan.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You're welcome.
I'm not saying you're stupid.
But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"
Your forehead's so big even Barry Wood said, "Wow, that's huge!"
Your momma is so dumb that when they said it was chilly outside, she came outside with a bowl.
What's one thing you'll never find in lost and found?
Your dad.