You're jokes
My life is so sad it's because you're in it.
Hey girl, are your pants a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself in them.
New Teacher: I was an orphan as a kid.
Students: Damn.
Teacher: Is anyone missing?
Students: Your parents!
Control tower to Boeing 747, you're clear to land on (said person)'s forehead.
Why is reverse cowgirl illegal in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
You're so slow, the sped kid is your tutor.
Your tits look heavy. Need help holding them up?
Free service for tit holding!
What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
You take your boots off before jumping on a trampoline.
If you pour paint in your eyes, the paint loses the 't'.
A patient walked into a psychiatrist's office last week wrapped in nothing but Saran Wrap. The psychiatrist said, "I can clearly see your nuts."
How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.
What's worse than ants in your pants?
Your uncle.
A young boy is stood on the top of a cliff crying. A priest approaches and says, "Why are you crying my son?" "My parents just crashed the car off the cliff and died." "It's just not your day today is it?" Said the priest, unbuttoning his flies.
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
Son: Dad, I know I'm adopted.
Dad: Well, how do you know?
Son: I found the adoption papers.
Dad: That is for your mum.
If you know, you know.
Your momma is so old she has been a waitress at the last supper.
I was going to talk about your chin, but I wasn't sure which one to write about.
An American bully goes up to an English kid and says, "You're ugly!"
And the English kid says, "Well, wanna know why you can't play Jenga?"
"Why?" says the bully.
"Because you haven't got a tower."
I went over to a crying child and said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at an orphanage!
I would kiss your lips, but your legs are blocking the way.
If you know, you know. 😏😏