You're jokes
When you go to your girlfriend's house but accidentally go into her dad's room and fuck him anyway.
Is your body from McDonald's, because I'm loving it?
Your
Walk up to an adopted kid and ask this, "How's your biological parents? Are they well?"
Boy: I'm dead.
Girl: Is that why you're so ugly?
Boy: No, I was just born this way.
Yo, Rob, you forgot to pay me cause you sucky sucky my thang.
AKA, you're up for adoption.
College is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you, or they'll send your kid back.
Your mama is so fat, the wall couldn't support her picture.
You're so short that I had to ask God why he made you short-ass toothpick legs.
Your mom said my cum tastes like Captain Crunch, bitch.
I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
Your mama is so stupid, Patrick Starr ran away because he thought she might be contagious.
A man wakes up and asks his wife, “Are you okay? You were cursing me all night in your sleep.” The wife replies, “Who says I was sleeping?”
Your momma is so fat, she eats insulation and thinks it's cotton candy.
Your momma! OHHHHH!
Your forehead is so big, I can write an essay on it.
Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.
Mom: Did you finish your homework?
Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.
Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.
Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!
Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.
Son: That was cruel!
Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.
When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."
His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"
Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"
10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"
There were two friends talking one day. Tim tells John, "I think I'm gay."
John says to Tim, "What do you mean?"
Tim says, "When I grow up, I want to dress like a woman and sing karaoke in a bar and call myself (Gillette the best a man can get)!"
John says to Tim, "I think you're right, and thanks for reminding me I need to buy razors."
How do Asian people name their children?
They throw a pan down the stairs.
What would your name be? Msg it to @chelsearosegraham.