You're jokes

Your mama's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, it said, "Viewer discretion advised!"

Your mum is stupid, just like you.

God, you're more toxic than white phosphorus.

Your mom uses the equator as a belt.

POV: Your dad is gone.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Not your dad. LMAO.

What animal howls at the moon and eats cement?

If you guessed wolf, you're right! I threw in the cement to make it hard.

Mommy, mommy! Are we outlaws? Your stepmom thinks so.

Mommy, mommy! Are we liars?

"Shut up and cross your fingers when you say that."

Wipe your feet before entering, but in Stephen Hawking's case, it is "Wipe your wheels."

Your mom is so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

My mom said that being straight is good, but if you're straight, how do you walk? So I decided to be gay.

Huh, I’m pregnant again. Must be something in the air.

Yeah, your legs.

What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?

Womxn

Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in 'em!

My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.

Person: What's your perfect date look like?

Me: Oh, just hanging around in a tree.

I like...

Wendy's.

"Wendeez nuts in your mouth."

Rodd Flanders: What's "gay" mean?

Bart: Uh, it means you used to be afraid, but now you're not.

Rodd says to his dad Ned: I'm gay, Daddy.

Roberto: Judd, your DNA looks like the infinite symbol.

Judd: Roberto, your DNA looks like a pasta noodle.

Speak to your dad before I put my hand up your ass!