You jokes
What do you call it when a cow gets disciplined by her parents?
Grounded beef.
Mommy, Mommy, are you an archer?
"Shut up and keep the apple on your head still."
You lost 30 lbs when you joined Weight Watchers, and lost another 10 lbs when they shaved your back.
Grandma isn’t responding. Close app, wait, cancel.
Which do you choose?
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Urmom.
If you kick an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents on you?
When you get injured 😢
When you get injured in America 😭😭😭😭💵💵💵💵💵🏩🏩🏩
Do you know what the "f" in "orphan" stands for? Family. Oh wait, there is no "f."
When the bully says, "You're adopted," so you hit him with, "At least someone wanted me!"
Children and your meat are actually quite similar.
At first you seem weirded out by spanking it, but later on you start to enjoy it.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie with Batman?
Two family reunions!
You look pretty today... April Fools!
What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll-up.
What do you call an emo's face?
Elmo's son.
Were you born on the streets? Because that's where most accidents happen.
Me: Mom, can I have some makeup?
Mom: No. You are beautiful just the way you are.
Me: So that’s why you wear makeup?
"Batteries, batteries, who the batteries in your remotes and everything else you got in your house is turned upside down?"
What do you call a bad player? A noob.
How do you make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles!
Hi how are you?