You jokes
A priest asks a convicted murderer on the electric chair, "Do you have any last request?"
"Yes," said the murderer, "Will you hold my hand?"
When you were born, you were so ugly that the doctors slapped your parents!
What do you call a committee of emo kids?
A cutting board!
What do you call an orphan’s picture?
A family photo.
You look so pretty. Not at all gross today.
My family is like treasure; you need a map and a shovel to find them.
What do you call German weed?
Mustard Gas.
Ring.. Ring.. Yes this is Dave from the Orphanage, "you make 'em we take 'em", how may I be of service?
Latias is red.
Latios is blue.
You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.
Little Johnny walked into his parents' room to see them going at it.
He asked his mom what they were doing, and she said, "Uh, we're play fighting," and he's like, "With no clothes on?"
She said, "Yeah," and so he said, "Let me join you then..."
Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.
Why don’t you get a book about how to commit suicide?
Because you won’t bring it back afterwards.
If you take an emo kid grocery shopping.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
When you step on the scales, it says "to be confined."
How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
Suck its cock.
I fucked your mom, oh wait, you don't have one.
If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
How do you know when it's bedtime in the Netherlands?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
Why can't you play memory snap in the jungle?
Because there are too many cheetahs.
Bro, you can't talk; you look like the dwarf from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.