You jokes
How do you get ten babies in a bowl?
A blender.
How do you get them out?
Doritos.
Rob, you forgot to pay me for letting you sucky sucky on my thang.
AKA you're for sale.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Some people decide to start a blog.
Others decide to start a blog.
You know what my sink started?
A clog.
What do you call a cow you can’t see?
Camooflauged.
Memes
Do you want to hear a paper joke?
Never mind, it's tear-able!
What do you call a mug? A mug dummy.
What do you get when skeletons are dancing in a tin can?
Noise!
You gay.
What do you call an alligator with a magnifying glass?
An Investigator.
My friend: Yo stupid.
Me: Is that right, and what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?
My friend: *rolls eyes and says whatever.*
Me: Keep on rolling them, you might find your brain in there.
What did one canyon say to the other?
You stay here, I'm gonna rise up on ahead.
What do you do when an orphan gets you mad?
A stab to the neck and a bullet to the face.
When you start sweating after filling in "C" for the third time in a row.
What time is it when you say "bad day?"
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Control freak.
Con...
Ok, now you say, "Control freak who?"
What can you build with people? A boat!
What name do you get if you mix the names Chris and Marisa?
Then you get the name Chrisa.
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
What do you call a sheep with wings?