You jokes

You're so poor, you lick postcards for food.

You are so fat that when you jump into the pool, everyone gets out.

Your hairline is so bad that it looks like you have Ironman's helmet on your head.

What do you call a red potato?

A tomato. 🍅

(I know it's cringe!)

Are you a builder? Because you are giving me an erection.

Yo hairline so put back that you could put 10 big size ramen noodles there.

What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control? A trip without kids.

What does it mean when there is a man in your bed, gasping for breath and saying your name?

It just means that you didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

My science teacher was talking about natural selection.

At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.

If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."

You know what I told my little brother plane?

What do you call the ghost of a chicken? A poultrygeist!

You are playing as Ukraine in Military Tycoon, and then someone kills you. You see who killed you in nuke revenge, and it says "Putinmoserfucer2342."

You're so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, you broke the correction.

What do you call a pregnant slave?

Buy 1 get 1 free.

Yo mama so nasty, she gave yo daddy head, then gave you a kiss good night.

I knew you played football because your hairline is receding.

I thought you played football 'cause you're hairline is receiving.

You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.

Orphan: Can I come over?

Girl: Yeah, but you have to bring your parents.

This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"

God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."