You jokes

Devil

To Drew the Devil,

We NEED to talk RN. I'm very mad at you, and we need to talk.

Angry Alex

Candace

Kid 1: Do you know Candace?

Kid 2: Candace who?

Kid 1: Candace dick fit in your mouth!

Love

Alex, you will never believe this!!!!!!!!!! Please respond as quick as possible! To my love, Alex!

Guy

Random guy: Do you know Dee?

Other dude: Who’s Dee?

Random guy: Dee Snuts!

Memes

Osama

Hello people, my name is Osama.

I'm back from the dead and I want to blow you.

Egg

What has to be broken before you can use it?

Answer: An egg.

Future

What is always in front of you but can’t be seen?

Answer: The future.

Promise

What can you break, even if you never pick it up or touch it?

Answer: A promise.

Company

Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.

Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.

Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.

Amber: Fine!!!!!

Fisherman

My grandfather is a great fisherman, especially at baiting a rod.

I guess you could call him the Master Baiter.

Ad

New Windex ad:

You should get Windex for that dirty mind!

Girl

A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."

Dryer

I went to my girlfriend's house one day in Alabama when I met her brother. He said, "Well, I guess there's no more you stuck in the dryer."