You jokes

How do you find Will Smith?

You look for the Fresh Prince.

What's the difference between a woman with a penis and a terrorist? You can negotiate with the terrorist.

What is the difference between a bag of chips and a gun?

If you pull one of them suddenly, everybody wants to be your friend.

Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got "fine" written all over you.

You’re like a fine wine. The more of you I drink in, the better I feel.

If you were a fruit, you’d be a ‘fine-apple.’

If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d still only have five cents.

Sorry man, but I got to say one thing. You know when a bully in a movie walks to you, then they walk up to you, and they smell you and say, "What are you doing?"

"Back To The Future"-Doc: You can time travel to anytime in HISTORY, Marty, but NEVER go to the year 2021.....

What do you call the original immigrants to the British Isles?

Anglosaxon.

Friend (Evan): Did you do some dumb shit?

Me: Hell yeah.

Friend (Evan): Did you get us both in trouble?

Me: Hell yeah.

Friend (Evan): Will I still help you because you are my best friend?

Both: FUCK YEAH!

I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.

He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"

Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"

What do you call a door hinge? A door hinge!

Are you a rope? Let's hang out by a tree and drink :)

You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.

Friend: I must order more nuts.

Why are you dumb? Because you can’t find LOLA.

My sister is really disrespectful, and her famous words are, "You're not my parent!" The next time she says this, I'm going to respond back with, "You're right, because I would have worn a condom to protect from you being born unlike my dad did!"

If a simp is staring at you, cover your mouth (they'll stop looking).

Jk: Jimin, why are you so small?

Jm: Excujjimi?

Jk: No offense, Jim.

Jm: Yah, call me hyung!

Jk: But I'm bigger.

Jm: I'm older!

Jk: I'm the top and you're the bottom, so I don't think it's right to call you hyung.

Jm:......

Why you never have to give a balloon to Elsa?

Because she will let it goooooooooooooooo let it goooo!