You jokes
Who needs dating apps when you have family reunions?
What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?
Tequila Mockingbird.
You also have to learn to say no. For example: “Would you like a piece of cake?” - “No, I would like two.”
A blind man walks into a woman's bar and asks the person next to him if she would like to hear a blonde joke. The woman says, "Before you tell your joke, you should know the bartender is blonde and has a shotgun, the bouncer is blonde and has a baseball bat, the two playing music are blonde and have pistols. Do you still want to tell that joke, cowboy?" He thought for a second and said, "Not if I have to explain it five times."
You're so skinny that people can't even see you.
Your gene pool is so shallow, you could break your neck diving in.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES fishing?
MC Angler.
What do you call a rapper who's ALWAYS on time?
Punctual P
What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
MC Illusion.
Why should you wrap your hamsters in duct tape?
So they don't explode when you f*** them.
What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
MC Presto.
What did the rapper say to his BROKEN PENCIL?
"You broke the beat!"
Wanna play dolls?
I can be Ken, and you can be the box I come in.
I have to file a complaint against Spotify because I didn’t see you on my hot singles last week.
Damn boy, you must be Nick Cannon because you don’t know when or how to stop.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have five fingers, two of them are for you.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?
I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
A money manager who counts bars.
What do you call a fat chick with a rape whistle?
Optimistic.
You hear about Rapboats' time in prison? He kept droppin' the soap on purpose.