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One day Nathan came in ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Nathan, what do you have to say for yourself?" Nathan says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Dave came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Dave, what do you have to say for yourself?" Dave says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then Mike came in a further ten minutes late to Mr. Jones's class. Mr. Jones asked him, "Mike, what do you have to say for yourself?" Mike says, "Please sir, I was on top of Cherry Hill." Then five minutes later a new girl walked in to Mr. Jones's lesson. Mr. Jones is at the end of his tether now and says, "Who are you and why are you late?" The new girl says, "Sir, I'm called Cherry Hill."

One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"

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    • You want to hear a joke about pizza?

    Sorry! Can't tell ya, it's too cheesy!

    What does a glass of water ask a pond?

    "Water you doing?"

    What does the pond answer?

    "Pondering life."

    Why does Adam go hockey, you might ask?

    In my opinion, he shouldn't go because he is bad, but he needs the armor to protect himself from his own step-dad.

    Why does Adam buy airsoft guns, you might ask?

    To defend himself against his own father... his life must be shit.

    What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.

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    • So you wanna play like that, ayy? Well, Sydney didn't wanna play like that either, and that's why you got arrested.

    A girl comes home and finds her dad and 4-year-old brother on the sofa. She says, "Dad, why is he wearing that face mask?"

    The dad buckles his belt and says, "There's more for you, hunny."

    Did you know that there is a new drug on the market for lesbians who are suffering from depression? It's called Trycoxagain.

    A foreign man came to America not knowing a word of English and right away began looking for a job. He became a chorus teacher and learned to say, "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" After that he joined the Army and learned to say, "Yes sir!" After that he worked at a restaurant and learned to say, "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" After that he worked at a candy store and picked up the words, "Goody-goody gumdrops!"

    A few weeks later, there was a murder in the area and he was the first person to be interrogated by the police. The interrogation went as follows:

    Policeman: "Who killed the man?" Foreign man: "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" Policeman: "Did you kill the man?" Foreign man: "Yes sir!" Policeman: "What did you use to kill him?" Foreign man: "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" Policeman: "You're under arrest." Foreign man: "Goody-goody gumdrops!"

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    • What's the difference between a dead baby in a dumpster and a treasure chest? It's a surprise when you find the treasure.

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