Year olds jokes

Bin Laden promised 76 virgins to Al-Qaeda.

Instead, there was one 76-year-old virgin.

My wife called me a pedo. That's a big word for a 6 year old.

The wine taster at an old vineyard died. A homeless guy, looking ragged and dirty, came to apply. He persuaded the manager to give him a try.

The guy was given a glass of wine. He swirled, smelled, sipped, and spit. “It's a red wine, Merlot, three years old, grown on the South Slope and matured in oak barrels,” he said. "Impressive," said the manager.

The man is given another. “Still a red wine, Cabernet, eight years old, from the Northeast slope, stored in steel vats.”

The manager was amazed. He winked at his secretary. The secretary understood and brought out a glass of urine. The drunkard tasted it and said, “It's a blond, 27 years old, three months pregnant, and if I don't get this job, I'll tell who the father is!”

"What did the blind, dumb, paraplegic, dead, eight-year-old child get for their birthday?"

"Cancer."

In honor of Michael Jackson, Starbucks is introducing the 'Jackson Latte'. It's 50 year old coffee, with 8 year old cream. Get it while supplies last.

What's the similarity between Catholic Priests and McDonalds? They both like sticking their meat in 6-year-old buns.

I like my women how I like my wine: 12 years old and locked in a cellar.

What do you call an 18 year old orphan?

Homeless.

I took my 5 year old son to ride some roller coasters. I think he didn’t like it because I challenged him to a no hands contest.

He said, "But I don’t have any." He wanted to know what dark humor is. Now he knows what it is and what it feels like.

I like my women how I like my scotch: 11 years old and mixed with Coke.

What is Michael Jackson's favorite snack? 5 year old whiners.

Why didn't Michael Jackson date 25 year olds?

Because there were only 20 of them.

Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.

When you're 34, it'll be 420 months before you turn 69 years old.

Did you know there are black holes billions of years old?

What’s more amazing is the black holes Stephen Hawking studied. We're only 14 years old.

A pedophile is playing poker with 8 seven-year-olds.

The pedophile has a pair of 7's and three 4's in the river. He smiles and says, "Yay, I got me a full house!"

They say watching child porn will get me 20 years in jail. I prefer to think of it as two 10-year-olds.

The time when Michael Jackson came in his pajamas during the trial. Whether or not it was because he saw a 7-year-old boy has yet to be determined.

Why did Michael Jackson decide to sell the ranch?

Because it was over 10 years old.

Did you hear they think Michael Jackson died from food poisoning? He ate 12-year-old nuts and a 13-year-old wiener.