What's the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling? One is a whiny toddler, and the other is a tiny waddler.
A priest walks into a wine store.
"Do you have any 10-year-olds?" Seller: "What the f- Oh, you meant 10-year-old wine." Priest: "I said what I said."
An old man goes to a church and is making a confession:
Man: "Father, I am 75 years old. I have been married for 50 years. All these years I had been faithful to my wife, but yesterday I was intimate with an 18-year-old."
Father: "When was the last time you made a confession?"
Man: "I never have, I am Jewish."
Father: "Then why are telling me all this?"
Man: "I’m telling everybody!"
I did so much research that I got bone-tired from doing this, tibia honest. You probably didn't find that humerus. I got a skeleton of these puns. I guess I could learn a femur puns. I was wondering if the creators of this site could talus how they come up with puns or maybe give some advice? I'm only 14 years old.
Johnny Depp to a 15-year-old girl: "Wow, look at that sexy body! Savvy!"
Michael Jackson, when talking about a 6-year-old boy: "The boy is mine! That doggone boy is mine! Don't waste your time...."
Donald Trump, Bill Clinton, and Jeffrey Epstein entering and exclaiming, "Wow, this place is more fun than the Playboy Mansion!"
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, "Dad, how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big dick?"
Her father replied, "Honey, you should have watched me last night. It was inside my mouth. Does it cycle now?"
What's better than sex with your 12 year old sister?
Rolling her over and pretending it's your 10 year old brother.
I was laughing my ass off when the 12-year-old child realized the door to my basement was unlocked, and he didn't need to cannibalize his two friends in a desperate attempt for survival. 🤣🤣🤣
A man is consoling his nine-year-old daughter after she had been sexually assaulted.
"You need to be more careful," he said as he wrapped his arm around her, "this time it was me, next time it could be a total stranger."
Two teenagers were raping an 11-year-old girl in an alley, so I stepped in to help. The little bitch didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.
What's the best thing about fucking twenty-one year olds?
That there's twenty of them hoo hoo hee hooo harr haar dee harr harr
Q: What do Burger King and Michael Jackson have in common?
A: They put meat on five-year-old buns.
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
In honor of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as other establishments, are introducing the Jackson dog. It's a 50 year old sausage between two 7 year old buns, with everything on it.
Bin Laden promised 76 virgins to Al-Qaeda.
Instead, there was one 76-year-old virgin.
"What did the blind, dumb, paraplegic, dead, eight-year-old child get for their birthday?"
"Cancer."
My wife called me a pedo. That's a big word for a 6 year old.
My 2 year old Asian baby cant do calculus Look who in sweatshop now
In memory of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as various places, is introducing the Jackson Dog. A 50 year old sausage between a 9 year old bun.
