Where would a snowman ☃️ go on his days off of work?
Snowhere.
What do bicycles and slaves have in common? They both use chains to work.
What is bus driver that does not work? A useless one ☝️
Why was the giraffe 🦒 late to work?
Because it got caught in a giraffic jam.
I started beating my washing machine because it wasn't working, my wife started crying.
My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house. Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job . My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I;m good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.
You work at papa's pizzaria ok?
Boss: your fired! Me: ok? Worker: Why are you fired? Me: oh you wanna know... *shows him the oven with my pizza* Me: I left my pizza in the oven that bitch burnt as fuck!! Worker: OH SHIT!! Boss: did you say pizza? Me: i sure did! *shows boss pizza in oven* Me: this hoe black as fuck! Boss: i fired you because i count stop looking at your ass not this why?
Q: where does a one legged waitress work A: IHOP
At work: Hey guys I'm gonna arnold clock out now.
Why does elephants never get rich? because they work for penuts!
When I was walking home, a couple of married guys was saying your mom is good at her job, but I realize my mom doesn't work. So I ask my mom why are these guys saying your good at your job, you don't work. My mom said yeah I got new job. So I said what do you do. My said job hand, no I mean is called a hand job
You want to hear a dirty joke?
This guy and this girl were having sex when the guys boss called to ask why he wasn't at work. The guy responds, "I'm sick" His boss replies, "you don't sound sick" The guy says, "I'm fucking my sister" and hangs up the phone
hot women with big boobs work at Hooters, but where does a handicap woman work?
IHOP
Doctor: What makes you feel depressed?
Me: I used to work at the World Trade Center, before the plane hit.
Doctor: A lot of people fell to pieces after that.
They said I was depressed, I should make an effort to do what I love. I had to pay a hooker for, twelve hours work. ... I felt nothing, but its was nice, being with someone who felt the same.
I aced my poker test...
my teacher asked me to reflect on my work, so I got a mirror...
A caffeinated vampire goes to sleep in a coffee-n...
do you get my puns... no, because you can't seem to get a grasp on how bad they are...
Are you Fin-ished with your work?
WE GOTTA WORK A-HEAD PEOPLE
How much work does a skeleton get done? A SKELE-TON
I love working with animals, especially when I get to hear their cries of help.
