Word jokes

White people can't say the N-word, but at least they can say, "Thanks for the warning, officer," and "Hi, Dad."

An orphan's first word would be "orphan keeper."

One day at school, Little Johnny and his friends were asked to do a sheet of paper which said, “Put a matching word from the word bank into the slot in the sentence that makes it make sense.” But when the teacher marked Little Johnny's papers, she asked why he put the word "bank" in every slot. And he says, “Well teacher, you said to put a word from the word bank and that's one word! So I had no choice but to put down that word!”

"Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner, chocolate's made." (Point to your boobs, vagina/crouch area, and then to your butt area in sync with words.)

Say "lettuce" and spell "cup."

Is someone who is tardy again actually "retardy"?

I fear my last words will be "hold my beer and watch this."

Chupapi Muñañyo

I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before kicking the bucket: "Hey, wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"

Why is dark spelt with a K and not a C?

Because they can’t see their parents.

What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?

"This isn't ketchup."

You soak balls, get it?

Yo mama so fat she starts the alphabet with the letter O... OBCD.

What's the difference between anal and oral sex? An and Or!

What did the Titanic say while sinking?

"It's going down."

My dad died the other day, but I was able to hear his last words: "Son, are you still holding the ladder?"

I was in class and we had to choose another term for words we use everyday. For kid, I chose "child"; for dog, I chose "pet"; and for wife, I chose "dishwasher."

I remember my son's last words: "I stubbed my toe!"

How many letters are there in the alphabet? 26? No, 8!

Why can’t blind people read this?

They can’t see.