Word jokes
One day at school, Little Johnny and his friends were asked to do a sheet of paper which said, “Put a matching word from the word bank into the slot in the sentence that makes it make sense.” But when the teacher marked Little Johnny's papers, she asked why he put the word "bank" in every slot. And he says, “Well teacher, you said to put a word from the word bank and that's one word! So I had no choice but to put down that word!”
Dear Autocorrect, I never wanted to spell the word "bigger".
Who read the most words?
911 passengers, they read 12 stories in 9.10 seconds.
I will always remember my dad's last words....
"15 dollars and I'll jump."
I'll always remember my Dad's last words before he died on 9/11...
Allahu Akbar!
Memes
I will never forget my girlfriend's last words... "Get off of me! STOP!" *slurp*... Dead.
In the bus, you can't spell "black" without "back."
What's an emo's favorite game?
Hangman.
My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut.
We got his EpiPen to help him when Penaldo appeared because he heard the word "PEN". He tried stealing the pen, but I said, "No pens for you," and "Brentford". He cried and ran away. Shame on you, Penaldo the fraud!
What starts with "E" and ends with "G"?
Everything.
What's the difference between saying "bloody" in America and in the U.K.?
In the U.K., it's a swear word.
In America, it's a family reunion.
I will remember my biker buddy's last words: "Why did you cut in front of me?"
I brought a new pen that can write underwater. It can also write other words.
"How would you describe yourself in three words?"
"Lazy!"
What was Michael Jackson's favorite word to say to parents and tabloids? "Leave me alone."
"This morning, I came out my front door to see my neighbor frantically trying to scrub off the word "PEDO" that had been spray-painted on his front window."
"What's been going on, John?" I asked.
"Fucking kids," came his mumbled reply.
The dirty bastard!
What were the Fortnite kid's last words? "I didn't know pumps are back in the game!"
What's the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
A girl tried 77.34 (77.34) times to think of a word opposite of BYE. Then her brother divided the word BYE. 77.34 divided by 100. TRY IT!!
These are all really nice jokes, but here is one.
Boy: Spell ME.
Girl: M-E.
Boy: You forgot the D.
Girl: There is no D in ME.
Boy: Not yet.