Women jokes
I hope there are no women on here because they just aren't that funny.
Why are women so bad at parking?
Because they've been lied to about what 8 inches look like their whole lives.
When men watch football but not the women's version maybe there.
A man and a woman are watching clouds together. The man says, “Hey, that one looks like a giraffe!” The woman agrees and says, “That one looks like an elephant!” The man sits up and says, “That one looks like a mushroom.”
What’s worse than giving women rights?
Having them. In the first place.
What do women and a Happy Meal have in common?
They both come with a toy.
Why didn't Michael Jackson have a girlfriend? He's afraid of women.
Women have ass and tits... but men have dick and rights.
I'm not saying I'm ugly...
But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.
When a guy falls, it hurts them there. When a woman falls, it hurts more.
Women suck (GET IT?!)
Why are all women's feet small? So they can stand closer to the stove.
Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.
Women: Can I have your number?
Jesus: No.
Women: Why? Are you scared?
Jesus: No. Just when you wanna talk, just pray.
The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!
Q. What do Canadian women and Canadian beer have in common? A. They're both stronger than they look.
One day a Chief was talking to his son... "Son," the father said, "Long ago the Woman didn't have anybody to take her to BINGO. So, the Creator put the Woman to sleep and cut off her butt cheeks and made her a Man. That's why today Indian Women have no butt, and the Men are called Buttheads!"
Money and women are kind of the same thing for me; it comes and goes very easily.
What do 100,000 battered women have in common? The bitch was wrong!
Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.