Women jokes

What's the difference between a joke and two dicks?

Women can't take a joke!

I like my women like I like my scotch:

12 years old and mixed with coke.

"Dad, what is 69?" asks son.

Dad: "Well son, it is a position where a man and women pleasure each other orally."

Son: "So what shall I write? Odd or even?"

Life is a lot like a penis. It's relaxed, and just hanging there.

It's women that make it hard.

Why do women buy clothes from the kids section? Because rapists prey on the weak.

I saw a dad shave his daughter's head because she made fun of a woman with cancer.

Good thing she didn’t make fun of a pregnant woman 🤭

So, I was watching YouTube, and then my friend says, "Those videos never get old." I replied, "Just like a Make-A-Wish kid." After I said that, he shot me in the head and said, "And now neither do you." Now I’m in Heaven, and God says to me, "Welcome to Paradise where it is summer days, clear skies," and I said, "Are there summer women?" Now here I am in Hell with my buddy Hitler. I believe he’s a hero after he killed Hitler.

"Hippoty hoppity, women are property."

Why do women love wind chimes?

They vibrate.

They say mistakes make you stronger. If that were true, then whoever made that nonexistent thing called “women's rights” would have muscles bigger than a white girl.

Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.

Wilt Chamberlain may have spread his seed among many women, but Kobe spread his brain matter all over California.

I bet you like men!

Women in general are jokes.

Gay gang.

What about women's lefts?

There are only women's rights causes because they leave you.

Dad: Johnny, Johnny?

Johnny: Yes, Papa.

Dad: Getting women?

Johnny: Yes, Papa.

Dad: Telling lies?

Johnny: No, Papa.

Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!

Why is life like penises?

Women make it hard.

I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.

Why are gay men better than straight women?

Because gay men are more willing to look after kids once they swallow them.