Why jokes
Why can't blind people fish?
Because it was "see food."
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home is.
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Why is the Tower of Pisa tilted?
Because it had more reflects than the Twin Towers.
Why don't orphans play football?
They can't find home.
Why is Santa so fat?
He only comes once a year.
Santa Claus gave a child a bike and a football. The child wasn’t happy. Why?
He had no legs.
Why are priests called father? Because it's not appropriate to call them daddy. Also because it is embarrassing.
Why didn't the two 4's feel like dinner?
Answer: Because they already ate.
Why did I make this joke?
Because I love jokes!
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he doesn't know where home is.
Q: Why didn't Jeffery Dahmer eat comedians?
A: He thought they tasted funny.
Why can't dinosaurs clap?
'Cause they're dead.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
Why did Stephen Hawking roll across the road?
Because he had amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.
You know why I hate paper? It's TEAR-able to the environment.
So a mushroom walks in a bar and the waiter says, "You can't be here."
And the mushroom says, "Why? I'm a fungi!"
Why were the people in the Twin Towers upset? They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead they got plane.
Why was Boiling Water hired by NASA (The National Aeronautics and Space Administration) to oversee their Space division?
Because it has at least one hundred degrees.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!
Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”