Why jokes
Why did Michael Jackson run?
Because he lost his glove.
You know why Elmer Fudd always came out hunting rabbits in the woods? Because Bugs Bunny would not stop flirting with his girlfriend.
Why did Stephen Hawking stop playing hide and seek with his wife?
She kept getting the metal detector out.
I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?
Guy #1 is being picked up by Guy #2 from the hospital.
Guy #1: Oh man, I just got my prostate checked. It's not looking good.
Guy #2: Why, what is it?
Guy #1: Turns out, I have prostate cancer.
Guy #2: Oh man that sucks...
Guy #1: Yeah, it's a real pain in the ass!
A father and son duo are sitting at a table, eating breakfast. The father looks at the child and says, "I'm hungry." The child looks at the father and replies, "Hi Hungry, I'm Son." The father calls his father and asks why he was named Hungry.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
His wife forgot to plug his wheelchair into the wall.
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
My "overweight" friend and I were talking at lunch.
Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly, dude?
Me: *annoyed* Jason, when you stepped on the scale this morning, it asked for your weight, not your phone number.
Why did the woman get raped in the ass?
She assed for it.
After the shooting, people were asking why they would do it.
They wanted to stop but it turns out they were playing an online game.
One day a Chief was talking to his son... "Son," the father said, "Long ago the Woman didn't have anybody to take her to BINGO. So, the Creator put the Woman to sleep and cut off her butt cheeks and made her a Man. That's why today Indian Women have no butt, and the Men are called Buttheads!"
Why did Timmy fall down the stairs?
Because he fell off his wheelchair.
Why didn’t the toilet paper cross the road?
Because it got stuck in a crack.
Why don't wheelchairs have pedals, so when their arms get tired, they can keep going with their feet?
Why did the skeleton want a friend? Because he was feeling bonely.
Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?
He fingered a minor.
Why doesn't Helen Keller's boyfriend like having sex with her?
'Cause she just lies there like she's dead.
My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.
A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"
My mom asked, "Why are you so depressed? It could be worse. You could be Tracy Latimer."
I replied, "I wish I were Tracy Latimer because then someone would kill me."