Why jokes
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent.
Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he wanted to.
Why does the Norway navy have barcodes on the sides of their ships?
So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
One cow asks another cow, "Are you afraid of mad cow disease?"
The other cow says, "Why should I be? I'm a helicopter."
A kid has an older brother that’s a very popular lifeguard. He sees all of the people that talk to his brother, but he’s fairly ignored. So one day he asks his brother why everyone likes him so much. His older brother says, “Well, all you gotta do is stick a potato in your pocket.” So the next day the boy goes back to the pool and he has a potato in his pocket, but everyone is avoiding him even more now. At the end of the day he goes up to his brother and asks why it didn’t work, and his brother says, “Dumbass, you were supposed to put it in the front!”
Why didn't Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Because he rolled over to the other side!
Why is it that when Donald Trump and Melania make love, she is always on top?
Donald Trump can only F@#k up.
Why haven't they just tried turning Stephen Hawking on and off?
Why was Stephen Hawking good at football? Because he is a pro dribbler.
Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone?
Because she got hit by a bus.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they don't know where home is.
Why did the duck not enjoy his restaurant date?
Because he didn't want to see the bill.
Why did George Clooney like egg jokes?
Because he had good taste.
Why were you born?
Because I asked out your mom on accident.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He didn't pay his electricity bills.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He ran out of WiFi.
Why aren't koalas actual bears?
Because they don't meet the koalafications.
Why did he go to hell? Because he couldn't use the stairs to Heaven.
Him: *slowly drives past elementary school while looking at kids*
Her: Why are you staring at those kids? *jokingly* Are you like a pedophile or something?
Him: ... At least you know why I love calling you "baby" now~
Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?
Because there wasn’t a ramp.