When jokes
Yo mama so ugly, when she sweats, the sweat runs down the back of her head to avoid her face.
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"
What did the father bullet say to the baby bullet when he killed a bull by hitting it in the eye: "Bull's eye!"
Yo mama so ugly when she looked in the mirror, her reflection threw up and ran away.
Yo mama so old that she knew "The Outsiders" when they were "The Insiders."
The minute I forget something
You're so fat that when you go on a walk with your friends, it looks like they are orbiting you.
Yo mama so fat, when she got ran over, the van did a 360 flip to Mars!
When the police saw your hairline, they gave your barber a breathalyzer test.
You're so fat, when you jumped, the whole planet wiggled.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, global warming starts.
I was reading a book one day when I suddenly heard a sound. It was the Grim Reaper. I ignored it and continued reading my book. Suddenly, I realized that I was one of the main characters, which, at the end, dies.
I used to like fireworks, but I'm dead now. Fireworks look like a charm if you don't mind something a little ghostly.
What lies beneath your nose and is being picked on? Your boogers.
What did the squirrel say when he chewed some saggy boobs?
Is it just me or do these taste like nuts?
Your hairline is so long that when I put it on email, it didn't send, which is ETHAN BRIDEWATER.
What is it called when the gynecologist slanders your grandfather?
A pap smear.
You're so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, you broke the correction.
How does a pimp answer when asked why he chose his occupation?
Answer: He wanted a stable source of income.
What did the guest say when he arrived at the peanut butter's dinner party?
“Nice spread!”
I wasn't close to my dad when he died.
Which was good. He died during 9/11.
What do you say when you hear someone tripping over at night?
Goddammit, Jamal!
When do you know your dad knows you are sneaking out? He hears the loud creaks.