When jokes
I made a bet with my friend that I couldn’t create a working car with spaghetti.
You should have seen her face when I drove pasta! 😂
What did the beaver say when it hit the wall?
Dam!
When they spilled coffee on his neck, he got hot under the collar.
What happens when you suck?
You succ.
When she says she wrestles, so you pull out your dick and she punches it.
What did the skeleton say when his girlfriend said, "I'm gonna break your heart?"
He says, "Go ahead, you're not breaking my 206 healthy bones!"
When your friend moves to Texas and she comes back a cowgirl.
YEEEHAWW!
What time is it when you get home, can you walk walk home, and walk walk home from school today? And...
What time is it when you stand on a pile of money in the bank?
High interest!
What time is it when you get home and you can't walk home?
What time is it when you get mad 😡 at school? Time to calm down.
Why was one afraid of every number in the world?
Because ONE wanted TWO get something THREE FOUR FIVE at the yard sale, but SIX was not there. SEVEN EIGHT NINE as well. When all but ONE remained, it got TENse.
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies? Windows plays the shutdown music.
She likes rough sex with handcuffs and I’ll be honest... She likes me to Chris Brown her when she acts like Rihanna.
I was at my drumming lesson and I accidentally dropped my drum stick when my sister made a terrible joke.
KA-DOOM-CHA!
What did the beachgoers in North Carolina say when there was a tsunami?
Nothing, they died.
What do you call Mary Berry when she’s on holiday?
A Cake By The Ocean.
What did the knight say when he went to bed?
"Good Knight!" lul
What do you say when your pet pig gets lost?
This is a pig problem!
One time, me and the bois got drunk and we were on the freeway...
...when the road was closed because a wild animal species named “The Cult” was on the loose.