When jokes
What does a depressed person say when they're happy?
"..."
Q: How do you know it's time for bed at the Neverland Ranch? A: When the big hand touches the little hand.
Your mum is so fat when she died the Earth was flat! 😂😂😂😂
Yo mama's so ugly, when she was little, she had to trick-or-treat by phone.
Yo mama's so stupid, when I said, "Drinks on the house," she got a ladder.
Yo mama's so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"
Yo momma's so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
Yo momma so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down!
Yo momma so dumb, when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon.
Your mama is so fat, when she farted, the world had to wear gas masks.
When's the best day to get the chair? Fry-day.
My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.
Yeah, Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide if you're ever gonna let me know, yeah. Suicide if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad, I know, yeah, I'm sad, I know, yeah. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide if you're ever gonna let me know, yeah. Suicide if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad I know, yeah, I'm sad I know, yeah.
I gave her everything. She took my heart and left me lonely. I think broken heart's contagious. I won't fix, I'd rather weep. I'm lost then I'm found. But it's torture bein' in love. I love when you're around. But I f**kin' hate when you leave. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide if you're ever gonna let me know, yeah. Suicide if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad I know, yeah, I'm sad I know, yeah. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide if you're ever gonna let me know, yeah. Suicide if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad I know, yeah, I'm sad I know, yeah. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide if you're ever gonna let me know, yeah. Suicide if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad I know, yeah, I'm sad I know, yeah. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide if you're ever gonna let me know, yeah. Suicide if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad I know, yeah, I'm sad I know, yeah.
When someone calls you gay, say:
"I'm straight, straighter than your hairline!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.
You're so black, when you get near the sun, we go into a solar eclipse.
Yo mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.
Yo mamma so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," he was just asking her to get out the way.
Yo momma so fat, when she said, "Order in the court," she really meant burgers and fries.
When you fall asleep on the couch and wake up in your bed.
But you know you live alone.