Whats jokes
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?
Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.
What's big and yellow and can't swim? A bus filled with children.
What did the French Fry 🍟 say to the Hamburger 🍔?
I guess that’s a wrap!
Why do New Yorkers get what Spider-Man is saying?
Because he always makes spider-sense.
What is the difference between eating a baby and a doughnut?
Babies are healthier.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What’s pink, rusty, and covered in cobwebs?
Madeline McCann's bike.
Hey guess what...
What...
My penis is big.
What are intelligent people in the US called?
"Tourist."
What’s a Muslim’s favorite car?
A Citroën C4.
What is a Russian joke?
Something that will be funny for Russian people.
What does the depressed person say to the happy person?
"Damn, I wish I was on the stuff you're on, lol."
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Redundant.
What does the man say about his baby sister Lydia? "I hope she electrocutes herself!"
What do you call a retarded fruit?
Mentally in-pear-ed.
What's the difference between a feminist and a pig?
There isn't one; they are both the same thing.
Q. What is the most endangered creature in India?
A. The baby girl.
A man was shaving in the bathroom when all of a sudden Bubba, the boy he payed to mow his lawn, comes in to take a piss. The man can't help but look over his shoulder and he is surprised at how well endowed he is, and he asks: "Bubba, what's your secret?"
Bubba replies: "Well, every night before I get in bed with a woman I whack my dick on the bedpost three times. It works, and it sure impresses the girls!"
The man was excited at this easy suggestion and decided to try it that very night, before he went to bed with his wife. So he got to bed and whacked his dick on the bedpost three times and the wife wakes up and says "Bubba, is that you?"
A father of five puts on a gas mask and a hazard suit and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked, "Dad, what are you wearing?"
The father answered with, "A costume for Halloween."
The child asked, "Can I join?" He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. After that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.
What did Santa Claus get Paris Hilton for Christmas?
He raped her.