Whats Jokes

What’s one thing that a gay person is scared of?

A gay guy that’s straight!

What did the ocean say to the other ocean?

Nothing, it just waved.

What’s the difference between a tire and three-hundred-sixty-five used condoms?

One’s a good year; the other’s a great year!

What happens when you have a kid with Tourette's and a hair trigger?

The Las Vegas shooting.

When I went to the doctor, he pulled his wife in and said, "What do you see?"

I replied, "A fat bitch." He said, "Ok, your eyesight is perfect."

What do you get if you talk to a Down syndrome person face to face at close distance?

Soaked...

What did the sun say to the Earth?

"Am I hot?"

What happens when you mess with a farmer? You get the whole ranch.

What does a Jamaican guy say to an Asian?

Poke me, mon.

It was 7:00 a.m. when Billy ran downstairs after a long night of sleep. He got to the kitchen where his mother and father sat. "What would you like for breakfast?" Billy's mom asked politely. Billy replied with, "Whatever Dad gave you last night in your bedroom would be great! You seemed to like it very much!"

What's the first thing you say in anal sex..... "Holy shit!"

What do you call a hospital that's flooded with vegetable soup?

What's the difference between having sex with my girlfriend and a baby?

I don't have a girlfriend.

What does a South African Batman wear? A cape.

Go punch an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

What's the difference between a million dollars and a million dead babies?

I don't have a million dollars laying around my house.

What do you call a retarded fruit?

Mentally in-pear-ed.

One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.

A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.

What's the difference between a little boy and a freezer?

The freezer doesn't scream when you put your meat in it.

What do you call a plane with no wings?

Sally.