Whats Jokes

What do fire and people have in common?

They will both eventually die out.

What did Hitler tell the eye doctor?

“I can na-zi.”

What’s bad about swinging a dead baby above your head?

Stopping it with the shovel!

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?

Head and Shoulders.

What's black and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron!

What do you call a bunch of Aboriginals rolling down a hill?

Abo-lanche.

What do you tell a female with 2 black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice.

A young teen was walking home from school and having a nice day.

She gets home, eats, showers, and heads to her room. The young teen hears her mother say something. Not sure what she said, the girl replies with "ok."

The young teen was gonna head to bed, wondering when her mom was gonna come in and say goodnight. She lays in bed, but then she hears her mom's voice say, "Hunny, I'm home." She doesn't bother to say ok.

Later, when she decides to sleep, she gets a message from her mom saying to unlock the door, that she lost her keys. :)

A kid came from school. His mother said, "What did you do in school?" The boy replied, "I had sex with my teacher." She said, "OH MY GOD, GO TO YOUR ROOM, WAIT UNTIL YOUR DAD COMES!" He waited, then his dad walked in and said, "Your mother told me what you did. I'm proud of you, son. Let's go buy you a bicycle." When they arrived to the store, the dad said, "Try out and see which seat is the comfortable." The boy said, "I can't, my butt is sore." Dad said, "Why is your butt sore?" The Boy said, "Because I had sex with my teacher."

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?

A painting only takes one nail to be hanged.

One day, Little Johnny came home with his girlfriend and told his dad, "We're gonna go to my room and do some homework." His dad said okay. Five minutes later, Little Johnny's dad heard noises coming from his room, so he went to go see what it was, and all he heard was, "Baby, baby, oh, baby, baby, oh." Little Johnny's dad started banging on the door and said, "Little Johnny, what are you doing in there?" Then Little Johnny said, "Dad, we're just having sex." Then Little Johnny's dad said, "Oh, I thought you were listening to some Justin Bieber up in here."

What's the difference between a pile of dead bodies and a computer?

I don't know, I have both!

What do you call an orphan family photo?

A selfi.

What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?

They never get old.

What do you call a girl skeleton dancing?

A bone-étit.

What did the airplane say to the paper plane? Why do you look like a wimp?

"Don't forget you are what you eat," said one person. "Then I should eat a skinny person!" said the other.

Most annoying thing...

When we send something in WhatsApp thinking our friend is online but can only see two grey ticks...

Little boy asked his dad why he was born black.

Father replied, "So the heat from the sun doesn't burn your skin."

Then he asks, "Why is our hair all frizzy like fuse wire?"

"So the coconuts when falling from the trees won't hurt you."

"Then what are we doing living in Rochdale? (England)"

I got up one day; my neighbor was in my house and was going to take me and my mom out. I showed my mom and my neighbor a trick. They both liked it. I asked my neighbor, "Do you know any tricks?" He said, "Yes, in matter of fact, I could tell you what your mom had for breakfast." I said, "How?" Well, my neighbor licked my mom's ass and ate her pussy out in front of me. He told me my mom had pancakes. So we were in the car; I asked my neighbor, "How did you know what my mom had pancakes for breakfast?" My neighbor said, "Well, that is what your mom made me while we were waiting for you to get up."