Whats jokes
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
Why are orphans rude at school?
What's the school going to do? Call their parents?
What’s an orphan’s favorite Netflix show?
Fuller House.
What did the baker say when he forgot the cookie sheets?
Ooh, snickerdoodles!
I find it best to screw people with memory loss. I mean, what's my grandma gonna do? Describe me to the cops?
What did one cow say to the other? You are mootiful!
Q: What do the St. Louis Rams and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell, “Jesus Christ.”
What do bats like to eat?
Bloodsuckers! 🩸🍭😂
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What did the traffic light say to the truck?
"Don't look, I'm about to change!"
What's the best thing about Switzerland?
I don't know, but the flag is a big plus.
What a skeleton baked for the other skeleton.
A pa_pıe_rus.
What's stiff and 6 inches long?
SIDS.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
What does the Bible stand for?
Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.
What’s the difference between dead babies and a cat?
The cat is still alive.
What’s the difference between cat food and tonight’s dinner?
Nothing, it’s all just mystery meat.
A man was kneeling on the church floor, crying desperately in front of the large wooden statue of Christ.
"My headphones are broken, Lord... I'm desperate... What should I do? Guide me!"
And the Lord appeared in the form of bright light, and the strong, deep voice filled the man's soul.
"WELL BUY NEW ONES, YOU DUMBASS!"
And so he did.
I went to the local butcher's and asked him what happened to his Saturday boy. The butcher replies, "I had to fire him, I found him with his dick in the meat slicer!"
"What did you do with the meat slicer?" I asked.
The butcher says, "I had to fire her too!"
Alternative punchline:
"I had to call social services, she was only 14."
There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"
The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."
The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”
One day I was texting my friend on Roblox and I made her mad. She told me she was gonna kill me.
That night, she told me to meet her at the bathroom at 2 PM sharp, but she made "sharp" in all caps. So I went to the bathroom at 2 PM the next day. Now I know what she meant by "SHARP" on Roblox... she brought a knife, and I was in hell by then. Like for the next part!