Whats jokes
What does a priest hold on to when having sex?
He holds on to the schoolbag.
What do you call a bad amputation?
A rip-off.
"what's that on your wrist?"
"I'm a cutting board. duh"
What are the differences between Santa and Joe Biden?
The kids actually want to sit on Santa’s lap.
If you are going to make fun of someone, make fun of orphans. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Double whammy.
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer, it never gets old.
I parked in a disabled space today...
...and a traffic warden shouted to me, “Oi, what's your disability?” I said “Tourettes! Now fuck off!”
I walked in on my dad fucking my little brother. I don't know what was worse: the fact that he was fucking my brother, or the fact that the abortion clinic let my parents take the fetus home....
What do Nike and the KKK have in common?
They both make Black people run faster.
What’s better than winning a medal at the Paralympics?
Being able to walk.
What's the difference between a six-year-old and a submarine?
I've never been inside a submarine.
What do masturbation and brain damage have in common? After a few strokes, there’s no going back.
A wife was cleaning her 12-year-old son’s bedroom when she found a load of serious bondage gear and fetish mags. She asked her husband, “What do we do?”
The husband said, “I’m no expert, but I wouldn’t fucking spank him.”
What do Spiderman and an orphan have in common? They both have no way home.
What do you call it when Panera Bread has bread?
Panera Bread.
When Santa asks you what you want for Christmas, then says "ho ho ho," say, "Yes, please."
What is an Emo's favorite way to Cosplay?
Dress up as a piñata!
What do you call a white guy with a 10 inch cock?
Asleep. Because that motherfucker's dreaming.
What do depressed kids and sloths have in common? They both hang from trees.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house is!
What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Black.