Whats jokes
I parked in a disabled space today...
...and a traffic warden shouted to me, “Oi, what's your disability?” I said “Tourettes! Now fuck off!”
I walked in on my dad fucking my little brother. I don't know what was worse: the fact that he was fucking my brother, or the fact that the abortion clinic let my parents take the fetus home....
When Santa asks you what you want for Christmas, then says "ho ho ho," say, "Yes, please."
What’s better than winning a medal at the Paralympics?
Being able to walk.
What has an N, an I, two Gs, an E, and an R?
Ginger!
A wife was cleaning her 12-year-old son’s bedroom when she found a load of serious bondage gear and fetish mags. She asked her husband, “What do we do?”
The husband said, “I’m no expert, but I wouldn’t fucking spank him.”
What do depressed kids and sloths have in common? They both hang from trees.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house is!
What do Spiderman and an orphan have in common? They both have no way home.
A depressed guy walks into a bar and says, "Can I get shot?"
The bartender then says, "You mean, can you get a shot, right?"
The bartender then says, "Well... what drink would you like?"
The depressed guy then responds with, "No, I really want to get shot."
What do you call it when Panera Bread has bread?
Panera Bread.
What do you call a white guy with a 10 inch cock?
Asleep. Because that motherfucker's dreaming.
What is an Emo's favorite way to Cosplay?
Dress up as a piñata!
What makes sad people jump? A bridge.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Black.
What's the difference between a six-year-old and a submarine?
I've never been inside a submarine.
Why did the Japanese NOT shoot down the American plane that was dropping atomic bombs?
From what their eyes saw, it was a piece of rice.
What kind of beer is an orphan's favorite?
Foster's!
yo mama so stupid she climbed up a glass wall to see what was on the other side.
what do you call a white person having a seizure?
a vanilla shake.