Whats jokes
Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.
A man goes into the streets of Moscow and yells, “I am tired of this guy with a silly mustache and stupid rules being a leader!”
A soldier heard him, so he goes and catches him. Later, he brings the man to Stalin. The soldier says to Stalin what happened and Stalin asks the man, “Who were you thinking about when you yelled in the streets?”
The man responds, “Of course, I was thinking about Hitler!”
Stalin lets him go, but then he stops the soldier and says, “Who were YOU thinking about?”
What do babies and explosives have in common?
They both make a noise when you throw them.
What’s the difference between a whale and Lizzo?
Absolutely nothing.
I caught a cold, Mary Earp caught the ball, what did the towers catch? The plane.
What is a disabled person's favorite type of comedy? Sit-down comedy!
What do you call a gay retard? Fruit and vegetable soup.
What did the bread photographer say to the toast? Say, "Toasted cheese!"
What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?
One of them is an outside job.
What do you call a Chinese millionaire?
Cha ching.
What do sharks and humans have alike? The great white one.
What’s the difference between a cow and Hitler jokes?
You can’t milk the cow after 12 years.
I read the joke "what we breathe is called oxygen, that is African food" to my African friend, but he is breathing in tears from his mother dying of hunger...
One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.
I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.
What would you throw between a priest and a nun? A bottle of whiskey.
What is your name? What am I pointing at? 👃🏽 And what am I holding? Hahaha!!!!! Knows nothing.
What starts with F and ends with uck? Firetruck, what were you thinking?
Question: What do you say to give a woman from West Virginia a "Nice Compliment"?
Answer: You say to her: "NICE TOOTH!"
I’m about to tell you the funniest joke I heard:
Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls emergency services. The operator then hears the problem and says, “Well, let’s make sure he’s dead.” A shot is then heard. The other guy says, “Ok, now what?”
Did you laugh?
What is Ronaldo's favorite fruit?
Oranges because they have vitamin C.