Weather jokes
How does a butcher keep his tent up in the wind? Steaks.
Yo mama is so ugly, when there was a tornado, the tornado refused to suck her up.
What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
Thunderwear.
What do you get when you cross a cold wind with a feather? A brrrrrrrr-d!
It was so windy I saw a chicken lay the same egg twice!
What did one hurricane say to the other?
"I got my EYE on you!"
My friend had no school because of heavy snow. Guess you could say it was a snow school day!
How did Stephen Hawking die? He went in the rain! 😂😂😂
I tried to take a fog machine, but I took the wrong one. Needless to say, it was a big mist-take.
Guys, I guess with all these storms there was a power cut in his house.
I tried to catch the fog, but I mist.
What do you call Mexicans running down a hill?
Sandstorm.
A German soldier is walking down the street during a hail storm when a lady suddenly falls over after being hit. He, along with a few others, walk over to her. One man asks, "What happened?" and the soldier replies, "Hail hit her."
Hurricane Irma, it blows.
Weather is like sex. Once in a while you need to get wet.
Two fish were swimming in a stream when it began to rain. "Quick, let's swim under that bridge, otherwise we will get wet!"
"Gosh, it's raining cats and dogs," said Suzie, looking out of the kitchen window.
"I know," said her mother, "I've just stepped in a poodle!"
What do you call snowmen having sex?
A snowjob.
I tried to catch fog, I mist...
I tried to catch fog, but I mist.