Poodle jokes

So, an Irish man is walking his poodle, and his buddy comes running up to him saying there’s a new pub in town and they’re giving out free pints.

So the man picks up his dog and runs like hell to the bar. But the bar owner stops him and says, "Sorry, you can’t go in." The Irish man says, "Why can’t I go in?" "Well, you have a dog, sir, and that sign over there says no dogs allowed. You’re going to have to leave him outside." Well, the Irish man thinks quick and says, "I’m blind; it’s a seeing eye dog." The owner says, "That’s ridiculous. A seeing eye dog would be a German shepherd or golden Labrador or something like that." The Irish man says, "Well, what kind of dog did they give me??"😂

When are you from Alabama? You know!!! 🐩

"Gosh, it's raining cats and dogs," said Suzie, looking out of the kitchen window.

"I know," said her mother, "I've just stepped in a poodle!"

What do you get when you cross a rooster with a small dog?

A Cock-a-POODLE-Doo!

What do you call a dog that is part pug, part poodle, and part cup?

A muggle! 🤠🤠🤠🤠🥴

Good morning, madam. I am from the local council. Can you please tell me if you have a dog license for that poodle you have on your head?

What do Civil War veterans and pedophiles have in common?

They both prefer Minnie (mini) balls.

Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.

Not done yet.

Now they are.

A pedophile is playing poker with 8 seven-year-olds.

The pedophile has a pair of 7's and three 4's in the river. He smiles and says, "Yay, I got me a full house!"

Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!

What starts with a P and ends in S? (hint: men have it and women want it). Pockets.