Want jokes
Why is it so hard to choose between buying a Subaru or a Volvo? Because you’re deciding whether you want to look like a rapist or a pedophile.
Women are like towers, the man wants to bang them both.
Why did orphans want to commit a crime?
Because they wanted to see what it feels like to be wanted.
TJ's hairline is so far back his friends don't even want to talk to his ugly ass!
TJ's hairline is so far back, his friends don't even want to talk to him.
Your forehead is so big, Humpty Dumpty didn’t want to fall off!
I killed 5 orphans and tried to sell their organs.
Nobody still wanted them.
While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, “No honey for you for one month!”
Later that afternoon, Johnny’s dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. “That’s it! No butter for you for one month!” says his dad.
Later that evening as Johnny’s mother cooks dinner, a cockroach runs across the kitchen floor. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. Little Johnny looks at his father and says, “Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?”
The teacher was terrified to hear Little Johnny swear.
“I never want you to use language like that again. Where on earth did you pick it up?”
“From my father,” said Johnny.
“Well, he should be ashamed of himself. And it’s no reason for you to talk like that. You don’t even know what it means.”
“I do,” said Johnny. “It means the car won’t start.”
A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. “I don’t want to know!” Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. “Oh, Pop,” Johnny sobbed, “For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you’re telling me now that grownups don’t really have sex, I’ve got nothing left to live for!”
A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day.”
The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie?” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”
Are you a knife? Because I want you.
I want to tell you a joke about 9/11... but I'm afraid it will be the bomb.
I wanted to make a joke about clocks, but I got no time for that.
I wanted to make a joke about homework, but sadly, I'm an orphan.
Why are all orphans criminals?
Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
My friend wants to do martial arts, but he's disabled, so I guess it’s partial arts.
What do you call a dog with no legs? Call him whatever you want, he's not coming.
Why do orphans become criminals? Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
There once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he wrote with the other hand. He got left behind.