Want jokes
I have to say my humor isn't the best, but I'll give this a go.
My science teacher always reminded us about kilometers per second. Now I want to kilometer per second.
You know those credit card inserters at Walgreens? I want to insert my credit card on my wrist.
I'll shut up now.
What's the difference between a criminal and an orphan?
One is wanted and one's not.
Her Name was Lola. She was a loner. At the Copa I saw her And I just wanted to bone her!
You want an insult? Right, look at the mirror.
If I wanted to kill myself, I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ.
McDonald's called back and they said they want their logo back.
If Republicans really wanted to enact pro-life legislation, they would ban guns, not abortion.
Why did Hittle kill himself? Because he wanted to buy a car, but then Hittler farted.
Why are adopted kids better than bio kids? Because their parents actually wanted them.
What do you not say to an Emo if you want them to come round? "Wanna hang out."
The Ruler of Varvona wanted a fruitcake, but his subjects showed up at his castle with a Christian instead.
And he said: "NO, NO, NO! YOU IMBECILES! NOT THAT KIND OF FRUITCAKE!"
Jack and Jill wanted some pills.
So they went to the dealer; he saw they were kids and said, "Fuck this shit," then Jack rocked his ass and took all the good shit except birth control pills.
Hello! I'm Taylor, and this is my life story with me and my ex girl. So when I was little, I met this girl. Her name was Leah. We were besties for a while until I turned 13. Then I asked if she wanted to date me. She said yes!
But one day, in the middle of school, she was talking to another man!!!!!!! AND THEY HUGGED AND KISSED EACH OTHER ON THE CHEEK!!!!!! Then, she told me she hated me. I was so upset!!!!!!!! Whatever you do, don't follow the ugly rat!!!!!!!!! <3
What was the first thing Thanos snapped?
Loki’s neck.
I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat.
She said nothing, so I took her to Africa.
Why did the orphan rob the bank? Because he wanted to know what it felt like to be wanted.
My ex wanted to humiliate me in front of her friends, so she said I was useless in bed.
Should have seen her face when they all disagreed.
To start off this Christmas season, I'ma make a list of what I want, then I'ma make plans with my family, then to start off my decorations, I'ma start with the first ornament and hang myself.
Why can't orphans be criminals?
Because they're not wanted.
You go h dichotomy lol what do you want to what what’s the name for the address for sure what’s what I name it says I name it lol I don’t o I have to get r CB n nu set set e Okay okay I’ll be at my place.