Want jokes
Why are they called s’mores?
Because you always want another one!
My pathological cheater of a sister wanted to play a board game with me.
I turned her down because I didn't like the Risk involved.
This is a Cuphead joke.
Why did the clown drive over the cup? Cuz he wanted to CRACK him up!
So, I was sitting with my little brother and talking about our dreams. "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" I asked him. He answered, "A doctor!" I wanted to tease him so I said, "I wouldn't be treated by a doctor like you." I was hoping he would get mad or something, but instead, he calmly replied, "Brother, I said doctor. Not a vet."
A week before Christmas my wife left me. She said I was too selfish and full of myself and she could not take it anymore.
On Christmas Eve, Santa asked me what I wanted for Christmas and I said, "All I want is the one I love more than anyone else in the world."
On Christmas morning I woke up in a box under my Christmas tree.
Friend 1: I don't want to jump.
Friend 2: Me neither.
Murderer: If you don't jump, I'll stab you.
Friend 1: *jumps*
Friend 2: *jumps*
Murderer: I didn't mean off the building!
Friend 1: I know that. I just pretended to jump to get rid of that guy.
Do you want to hear a joke?
Never mind, it’s too punny.
Why was the turtle looking at her phone?
She wanted to take a shellfie.
Why did the dog want a kiss? Because he can see his knees.
A guy entered a library and wanted to get some books to read. He was searching across the books, and the librarian asked him,
Librarian: What are you looking for?
Man: I am looking for a book!
Librarian: Which book?
Man: Facebook.
Bessie Coleman - I don't want to be a flier cause I am African American.
Why did the orphan want to become a prostitute?
To get a daddy.
How does a gay man trick a heterosexual man into giving him a blowjob?
The gay man asks the heterosexual man if he wants to give him a "brojob."
Hello Miss Chandia, here. I want to tell you guys a joke.
What do jokes serve for dessert?
Want to hear a pun?
Well, I'll punch you with one!
Want to know something good about people giving ZERO fucks about you and living in the country?
Everybody knows nothing.
"SCOOT WANT TAXI!" Ok, maybe I do but can't make it there because yo mama is so fat he can't hear me on the other side.
I call my sister a "fat cow," and she asks me, "Want to hear a joke?" I say, "Sure." She says, "You are the joke!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
He was just feeling like he needed a break, you know? Life is hard when you're a rooster looking after your hen and chicks. He just wanted a sense of normality, walking out of the farm. He felt light-headed, staring into the distance. Then, at this very moment, he realised it was his darkest hour.
Join us for more of the story, after the break!
What is the difference between a feminist and a female prostitute? If you want a female prostitute to be a bitch, you have to give her money first.