Violence jokes
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw the baby.
A man goes to a motel room and sees a woman tied up and she said, "Help me please!" He had to do some forceful thinking.
Sonic says: If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire.
Now we call him hot wheels.
What does an autistic kid and a porn video have in common? You can shoot both of them, just not in public.
I was walking down the street one day, and I passed the gun store. I walked in, and everything was half off. I didn't know back-to-school sales had started already!
What does a cannibal do after eating its vegetables?
Sells the wheelchair.
What did the pencil say to the sharpener? Please grind me!
What’s the worst part of being a pedophile?
Getting the blood out of your clown suit.
A black dude hits up a trap house for some crack and Hennessy, flashing his grill and boasting 'bout his gangsta life. The dealer snarls, "Pay up, fool. Or face the pipe!" He shrugs, "I'm broke, n***a." Suddenly, the dealer's ripped enforcer yanks him down, cuffs his hands with zip ties, shoves a vibrating dildo gag down his throat, slaps his ass red with a spiked paddle, then rams his throbbing monster cock into that tight hole, pounding savagely while choking him with a chain collar, flooding his guts with hot cum as he moans, "That's your high, bitch. Addicted yet?"
What do you call a violent fish?
A smackeral!
Roses are red, My heart, my heart is dead. I have a gun straight to my head.
I was gonna go to a shooting gallery, but I realized that schools aren't open on Sundays.
If you're bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
I talked to a future suicide bomber. I told him, "ISIS ain't got sh** on me because I planted a bomb and lived."
Why do lesbians have the highest rate of domestic violence?
Because women are emotional and full of drama.
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin.
How do you make a cat say woof? You cover it in petrol and light a match.
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
My favorite sex position is the JFK:
I splatter all over her as she screams and tries to get out of the car.