Violence jokes

When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.

Everybody misses Xxxtentacion, but the bullet didn't...

Eric's mom asked her son why his bag was heavy and if it was because of books. Eric replied, "No, magazines."

Do you know what you first feel when you shoot someone?

The recoil.

I wasn't cut out for running today, but those cops came out of nowhere.

Woman: "I want coffee, black."

Cop: *takes out gun* "WHERE?!"

Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? - Everywhere.

An apple a day keeps a doctor away... at least if you throw it hard enough.

If you're ever angry, go ahead and punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

My therapist said: "Time heals all wounds."

I shot her, now we wait.

I'm not saying I hate you. I'm just saying that if I could go back in time, I'd give your mom a coat hanger.

Apparently, someone in London gets stabbed every 52 seconds.

Poor bastard.

What's the difference between a feminist and Hitler?

Both were good at starting wars, only difference was Hitler knew when to kill himself afterwards.

Violence against women is funny :)

Pickup line; Hey mama, you school? Cuz I'd like to shoot some kids up in you.

If you are ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

What’s the difference between fruit and dead babies?

I don’t put fruit in a blender.

When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesn't pay anymore.

What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.