Violence jokes
*The doctor asking why I've broken 19 bones in the past week*
*My abusive mum- Go on, tell him!*
Well what am I gonna do now...
When you decide to turn your high school into your personal shooting range, but you don’t give any proper notice except for a bullet to the head...
If you ever get mad, just hit an orphan.
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Sally has no arms. She fell off the swing. Why? Someone threw a fridge at her. AAHAHAAAHHAHAH!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
How hard can you throw them!
How do you get ten babies in a bucket?
With a blender.
There's a new cooking programme on BBC1. The contestants are victims of domestic violence. It's called "Can't Cook... Right Hook."
Why did Tyrone drop his ice cream cone?
A: He got shot.
Why did the guy run because the girl ripped his penis off?
What's black, white, and red all over?
Lossvagus school shooting.
Me: Wanna play 9/11?
Friend: What's that?
Me: It's a game where I kick you in both legs and watch you fall.
My brothers kept annoying me.
I told them I would disembowel them if they kept it up.
It was an empty threat—right after I was done.
Oh my god, she hit me with a bat,
'Cause she was transgender.
What's white, black, and red all over?
A zebra who walked into a hunting reserve.
I showed my girlfriend my shotgun yesterday. It really blew her away.
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.
What does a woman do when she leaves the battered women's shelter?
"Cook my dinner, if she knows what's good for her."
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing you haven't told her twice already.
Hey, What do you want? We broke up like 5 days ago, leave me alone. Ok, first wanna do some things? What kind of things? Illegal things. Like what? Knock you off and hide your body. 🤡🤡🗡
The quiet kid starts playing "Pumped Up Kicks" in the parking lot before school.