What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you've told her twice.
When I'm bored, I like to slap orphans. I mean, what are they gonna do, tell their parents?
How did I kill Georgee?
I snatched her boat! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!
One day, I came home from school and said to my dad, "I got expelled from school today." He said, "How?" I said, "I threw my book at the teacher." He asked, "Why?" I told him, "We were doing an anti-bullying program, and my teacher said words can't hurt me, so I threw my dictionary at her."
What turns green to red in a flick of a switch?
A frog in a blender.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a watermelon? One of them is fun to hit with a sledge hammer and the other one is just a watermelon.
In Saudi Arabia, our pick up lines are, "Girl, are you a terrorist? Cuz you da bomb."
I'm not saying I hate you, but if you got hit by a bus, I'd be driving that bus.
What's the best thing about abuse jokes? The punchline.
Me: What do you call a group of retards?
Friend: Down town?
Me: Nope, target practice.
Go commit neck rope.
I'll never forget my mother's last words: "What are you doing with that sledgehammer?"
What’s the difference between an alligator and a child?
You can’t abuse an alligator.
You can't lose Kahoot if you "kashoot" the class first.
There is only one thing I have to give my enemies.
A bucket full of dead baby heads and semen so they can replenish their spawn.
Why did Sally fall out the window?
She was pushed.
Pickup line; Hey mama, you school? Cuz I'd like to shoot some kids up in you.
Somebody called the cops for a school shooting, what a snitch!
What's the difference between a dog and a rapist?
At least the rapist adds a bit of foreplay before he starts humping people.
One day, someone goes out into the forest to go hunting, and finds out there are a few others in the forest. He comes back the next day to learn he is the only person there.
Where are the others?
They're in his freezer.
