Versus jokes

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? -- Because the octopus was well armed.

What's the difference between a smart blonde and a dinosaur?

The dinosaur once existed.

Dream: Speedruns Minecraft.

Technoblade: Speedruns Life.

What's the difference between an elephant and a feminist?

The feminist is overweight.

What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.

What's the difference between a pope/preacher and acne?

Acne comes on your face when you're 13.

What’s the difference between an egg and a wank?

You can beat an egg.

What is the difference between a Rubik’s cube and a penis? I don’t know, but they both get harder the more you play with them.

What is the difference between a human and a bird?

A bird can fly and a human cannot fly.

What is the difference between a pencil and a woman?

At least one has a point.

What's the difference between Hitler and Logan Paul? At least Hitler had respect for the Japanese!

What's the difference between Hitler and a feminist?

At least Hitler actually did something.

What's the difference between parents and depression? At least one of them leaves you.

What is the difference between the rook and the bishop? The rook goes straight, while the bishop moves diagonally.

What's the difference between a fly and a bird?

A bird can fly, but a fly cannot bird.

What’s the difference between my ex and a unicycle?

A unicycle can only take one person at a time.

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a hockey player?

A hockey player gets to shower after three periods.

what's the difference between apples and orphans? ... the apples get picked.

Why can’t you sell nans, but you can sell zebras?

A leaf and an emo fall from a tree. Which hits the ground first?

The leaf. The rope stopped the emo.