Vehicle jokes
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor?"
Three women—a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead—are riding through the desert on a dune buggy. About two hours later, their vehicle dies with no gas, and they're forced to travel to their destination on foot, but they all agree to carry something with them.
The brunette brings canteens of water.
The redhead takes a large beach umbrella.
The blonde somehow rips off the car door.
The redhead asks her, "Why did you take the whole car door?"
To which the blonde replied, "So I can roll down the window in case it gets too hot."
What do you call a flying octopus?
An octocopter! 🚁
Two fish were in a tank. One turned to the other and asked: "Hey, how do you drive this thing?"
What did the traffic light say to the truck?
"Don't look, I'm about to change!"
A truck carrying Vicks VapoRub overturned on the highway. Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours straight.
A girl called me ugly.
So I drove over her with a car and called her flat.
What happens when a frog parks illegally?
It gets toad.
What's the difference between me and a bus?
I'm not on fire...
Why don't dwarfs have cars?
Because they can't get in the door.
What's the similarity between gay men and an ambulance?
They both take it in the back and go woop woop.
What did the frog do when his car broke down?
It was toad.
Why did the frog take the bus to work today?
His car got toad away.
What bounces up and down at 100mph?
A baby tied to the back of a truck.
Apple tried to make a car, but it had no windows ;)
I wonder if Stephen Hawking was an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-kart.
What’s big and black on the road?
What’s got 4 wheels, does a barrel roll, and goes from green to red in seconds?
Kermit in a car crash.
How do rabbits travel?
By hareplane.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.