What do you call a sped kid in a wheelchair that caught on fire?
Hot Wheels.
A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.
This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.
Kids in the backseat make accidents, but accidents in the backseat make kids.
My wife told me I could never, ever build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
Yo ass built like a wide body Hellcat!
What is the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because he got hit by a car.
If Hitler was in a car doing his salute, he would be saying, "Take the third right."
Why do sisters have to be in a relationship? Because you don’t have to worry about your car.
What do you call a disabled kid on fire?
Hot wheels.
What do you call a Mexican who's lost his car?
Carlos.
I went to the dump truck today, and my wife said, "Thanks for visiting."
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
You can't use a pitchfork to get the bowling ball out of the truck.
Two priests are driving down a road when they are pulled over by the cops.
The cop shines a light in their faces and signals to the driver to roll down his window.
"We're searching for two child molesters," he says.
The driver leans over to the other priest, and they whisper between themselves.
Finally, he turns back to the policeman. "Ok. We'll do it."
What did the traffic light 🚦 say to the car 🚗? Don’t look, I’m about to change!
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.
I love taking my daughter out in the car. Every time we go over a speed bump, I tell her we ran over another dog. 😂
The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.
"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"
So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"
"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."
How do you get 100 babies in the back of a pick up truck? Blender.
How do you get them back out? Straw.
What color is your Bugatti?
