Your dad never needed a van for you.
How do you know you're following a DeLorean? The white line disappears.
Can you drive a pizza? Of course, as long as you change the olive oil.
What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield?
Its butt.
There are two Mexicans in a car. Who's driving?
A cop.
Where would an astronaut park his spaceship? A parking meteor.
If you run next to a car, you get tired, but if you run behind it, you get exhausted.
I'll be here all week... sadly enough for you.
When they say you live by the sword, you die by the sword, not in Paul Walker's case. He lived by the car, died by a tree. Well, I guess the car was stumped.
Why did the car key never fit in?
He was too door key.
How many times does 42 go into 9?
Get in the van to find out.
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits a car's windshield at 100 mph?
Its ass.
How many astronauts can you fit into a VW Bug? 11, 4 in the seats, seven in the ashtray.
What kind of shoes does a kidnapper wear?
White vans.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.
I got caught doing donuts in the parking lot, and I know what y'all are thinking.
Who names their dog Donuts?
Levon Aronian's wife died in a car crash. That's wheelie unfortunate.
Whatβs the difference between women and cars?
At least cars retain some of their value after getting wrecked.
What's a terrorist's favorite car? A Porsche 9/11.
Whatβs the difference between my ex and a unicycle?
A unicycle can only take one person at a time.
My bumper sticker says: "πFORMER BABY ON BOARD."
