I tried dressing up as the plane that crash into the twin towers for the office costume party It didn't land too well
This girl told me people call her ugly because she is disabled. I told her to stand up for herself.
These jokes cheered me up from suicide. This is amazing material. God bless all of you.
An Emo girl walks up to a tree to give it a high five... the tree left her hanging
Tits are like Lego bricks. They're there for the kid, but dad ends up playing with them.
A young boy was picked up by a strange young man who put him in his car and drove into an abandoned farm “This place looks scary” they kid said And the man replies” I know right, I have to walk out of there alone”
When you suffer from depression and Somebody tells you to just cheer up-- Me: my goodness, what an idea! why didn't i think of this before
So I hooked up with a girl at a party, but I forgot that it was a family reunion. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA STARTS PLAYING
Johnny: Mommy, Mommy! What is incest? Mom: Shut up and keep licking.
up into the sky so very far here comes Dr. Seuss ALLAHU AKBAR, at the ripe old age of 97 he committed 9/11
How do you help a suicidal person cheer up? You Tell them its a leap of faith
I told my friend yesterday he's literally my dad.
He didn't show up for the rest of the year.
It's been raining for days. My wife is totally depressed. She keeps looking through the window. If this keeps up, I'll have to let her in.
Hellen keller picked up a cheese grater, it was the most violent story she'd ever read.
My Xbox has been acting up lately...
So I painted it black to make it run faster
(This is a fucked up pick up line) are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11
Why do trees never call emo kids?
The emos always hang up on them.
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.
Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
Man walks up to a priest. The man says "I am Jesus Christ." The priest says "No you are not my son." The man says " Follow me." The man walks into the bar and the bartender says "Jesus Christ your back!"
My teacher gave us an assignment and one of the questions was "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I answered "Happy". The teacher said I didn't understand the test, I said to her that she didn't understand life
