Why does Stephen Hawking do one-liners?Because he can ́t do stand up.
I was gonna walk up to a emo and say do you get jealous when your phone dies
Never buy a epileptic kid light up sketchers
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Window Problems A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won't open." Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer." Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now.”
When the emo kid hangs himself and the autistic kid thinks that it's a pinata... BATTER UP TO THE PLATE!
My ceiling isn't the best... But it's up there!!!!
In preschool, i confessed my love to my crush, and she rejected me. As heartbroken as i was, i sucked it up and went back to teaching.
Why did Sally get to go to Hawaii for free?
She washed up on the beach.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Are you enjoying my yolks. I bet there making you crack up. If not, I better scrammble
In my mother's generation, they grew up with Wonder Woman. In ours, we have to wonder if she's a woman.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke marijuana, Jack got high pulled down his fly and ask if she wanna, Jill said yes and pulled up her dress and had a little fun, stupid Jill forgot the pill now they have a son
A man is at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. A few years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?
Man looks at his friend and says "if you and a friend go camping and you two get really drunk and in the morning you wake up with a condom in your butt would you tell anyone? " The friend says im a disgusted tone "No" So the man says "ok let's go camping"
My black friend told me to stop making racist jokes... ...I told him to lighten up.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
You know when you sign up for something and it says *im not a robot* guess he never had the chance to tick that
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up - when they hang themselves.
I was playing hangman, and I gave up on the word "LIFE".
