jesus and satan are just basically homer and flanders. one tries to help the other, only for satan to just say "shut up".
(A horrible pick up line) are you the two towers? Cause I'd love to take you out 🤭
nostalgia hits you like a train. it's so hard, you can even wake up.
why didn't the orphans stay at the park for days? because they had no one to pick them up. what's a orphans best friend? a boomarange because it's the only thing that ever came back.
When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 and 976 numbers, he doesn't get charged, he holds up the phone and money falls out.
A man sees a small boy begging for money. He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.
The boy asks, "What gave me away?"
The man responds, "Your parents."
A handicapped person tells a good joke,but he cant be a stand up comedian😂😂😂
Jack and Jill went up a hill
To pick some dill
Jack slid down the hill and hurt his leg of skill
And he needed a painkiller pill
Cristiano Clapnaldo woke up FEELING DANGEROUS against Real Sociedad 🥶🥶
- 0 tapins 😍😍 - 0 assists 🤩🤩 - 3/3 dives 🤯🤯 - 0 key passes 🥵🥵 - 2 big chances missed 🤡🤡 - 1/4 dribbles 💀💀 - 2 Offsides 😤😤 - 27 claps 👏👏
Better than Elanga? 🥶🥶
Why does fire man wear red suspenders? To hold his pants up
I was playing hangman, and I gave up on the word "LIFE".
I see a kid crying in the park right. So I go up to him and say " hey where are your parants" and he says "well my dad left to get the milk and never came back and my mother died in a plane crash in the Bermuda triangle
My black friend told me to stop making racist jokes...
...I told him to lighten up.
I’m going back to the house to get some stuff for my dad and then I’m going to have a car and a birthday party came up for the weekend at the end of the week I was going to get my birthday cake for the day
I was doing a magic show, i tried to make a bunny disappear but it didn’t work. I walked outside in shame, i looked up and realised the towers had disappeared!!!!
Hey, you know what I told the kid on wheel chair?
I told him to be a stand up comedian
Mom can I be a fire fighter when i grow up Mom: oh you wont grow up caillou
Two natives sit in the bar getting shit faced. Almost closing time brother you gonna snag yeah I'm taking her home he walks over she gathers her things. Walking out together he takes her to his car outback they stay messing around then start having sex he starts to get carried away he looks at down at her she looks up at him and says slow down cousin your going to fast...
If this pops up on your timeline , fuck you
My son came up to me and said “mom, where are your parents?” I stared in confusion i said “in a far place.” He asked “In and orphanage?”
