Ugliness Jokes

There were 15 ugly guys on a bus. The bus crashed, and they all went to heaven.

God took pity on them and told the ugly dudes they could have one wish. The first guy said, "I want to be handsome." God granted his wish. The second guy said, "I want to be more handsome than the first guy." God granted his wish. The third guy said, "I want to be more handsome than the second guy." God granted his wish, and this continued on and on until the 15th ugly guy. The ugly guy was laughing, really hard. "What is your wish?" God asked him. "I WANT ALL THESE GUYS UGLY AGAIN!!!!!" God granted his wish.

Your mom is so small that she can fit in the luggage

Your mama so fat that’s why Hulk gets big

bell so ugly she acts like a boy

Yeah, Asians have squinty eyes, but that's because they have had the displeasure of seeing so many ugly obese Americans in one place.

This girl told me people call her ugly because she is disabled. I told her to stand up for herself.

If a man says you’re ugly, he likes you.

If a woman says you’re ugly, she’s just jealous.

If a child says you’re ugly, well, you’re ugly.

An ugly, arrogant woman walked into a store with her 2 kids, yelling at them.

The store clerk pleasantly said, "Good morning ma'am and welcome. Nice children, are they twins?"

The ugly woman stopped yelling and said, "Hell no they are not, one is 9 and the other is 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just bloody stupid?"

The clerk replied, "I'm neither blind nor stupid ma'am, I just can't believe someone would screw you twice."

You're so ugly, when a pig saw you, it thought that you were their family member.

Your mama so ugly that even Rick Astley had to give her up.

My brother is ugly. One time he stuck his head out the window. The police arrested for mooning.

lowkey "discharge" is an ugly word. I prefer créme de la meow meow.

My brother called me short and ugly, so I called him an ambulance.

I know why Asian's eyes are always closed. It's because Americans are so fat and ugly.

A hot girl wants to commit suicide and jump from a bridge when an ugly, smelly, homeless weirdo walks up to her. And he says, "Hey you hot babe, let's fuck." She just answers, "Get the fuck away you ugly bastard." The guy just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."

Your mom is so ugly. When she goes to the dentist, they make her face down.

What do you call a fat, ugly, and hairy woman with a rape whistle? A feminist.

I'm not saying you're ugly, but you're the reason God created miscarriages!

What do you call someone who hates rape jokes? An ugly feminist that couldn't get a cock in her mouth.

You're so ugly, when you went to the makeup store, it shut down.