Trust jokes
Stop hating on pedophiles. At least they're good babysitters.
Father: "I don't trust you. You poured your seed in my daughter's belly."
Son: "But Paah, you can't fire me."
Father: "You're lucky you're my brother too, or I'd kill you."
The only hood I like is pointy and white.
That's why I can't trust people when I don't see their face at night.
Listen, my friends say I am gay, but I tell them I am not because I am not happy. In fact, I have no life. You are my friend. I trust you with my life. Now, can you take it?
Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, “I want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.”
Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. “Mein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?”
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. “You see, no one cares about the Jews.”
I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t feel like screaming.
I don't really trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say "press," but if you press those badges, they just fall over, all surprised.
Carly (😊): What a beautiful day, huh?
Bianca (😔): Yes, for you it is.
Carly (😟): What's wrong?
Bianca (😕): Nothing, nothing at all...
Carly (😠): Don't lie to me...
Carly (🤔): Hmmm... Jordan???
Carly (😈): Because if so, I can take him out like this...
Bianca (😔🙄😒): Thank you... no... and I don't give a damn anymore!
Carly (😠): Bianca, trust me, you don't love him anyway!
Bianca (😒): Please, Carlyana, please keep your fucking face out of this.
Carly (😈): No need to curse, I can do that to Jordan if you want...
Bianca (😔): Well... shut your mouth and leave me alone!
Question: Why can't you trust a tree?
Answer: 'Cause they are always shady.
I tore up my homework, but then I replaced it with this copy. It may look like it, but trust me, it's different! The answers ARE RIGHT, better than left!
I asked my now ex-boyfriend why he’s scared of my cat. He said it was because of the scratches on my arm.
I told him that my cat doesn’t scratch, but he didn’t believe me. He realised what I meant when he noticed I kept hiding my wrist from everyone else.
(Kinda based on the fact that my ex is indeed scared of cats, and he has been scared of my cat, so yeah 😂)
Danny's Chromebook, Charger in his eager hands, Power for his world.
Fingers click and type, Words flow with electric grace, Thoughts come to life.
Screen illuminates, Imagination takes flight, Limitless pages.
Infinite knowledge, Unleashed through digital realms, Chromebook charger's might.
Danny's trusted friend, Always ready to connect, Bound by cord and fate.
Together they thrive, Exploring vast horizons, Endless possibilities.
Danny with his Chromebook charger, A duo, unstoppable, Unleashing their dreams.
My version of the Roses are Red Poem in MW3:
I thought Soap could trust you. And so did I too. So WHY IN BLOODY HELL DOES MAKAROV KNOW YOU?!
"How is your long distance relationship going?" -- "So far, so good."
Why can you trust a donut? It tells the hole truth!
My sister gives her hamster to my brother since she thinks I'm irresponsible, so I throw it out the window.
Why doesn’t Jesus trust humanity anymore?
Because he doesn’t wanna get double-crossed.
You ever get the feeling when your parents are cheating on you? I do.
A wife asked her husband why he cheated on her. His reply was, "She was just lying there naked on the table, what was I supposed to do?" The wife replies, "Perform the fucking autopsy!"
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.