Tree jokes

Fruit is like ex-wives.

They both look really good hanging from a tree.

Why did the koala cross the road?

To get to the big tree.

Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for BLESSEDBRIAN. I think he owes it an apology.

What's a rapper's favorite kind of tree?

CYPRESS HILL.

My step-dad works at a lumberjack company and he took me to work. I went climbing trees later that day and now I'm in the hospital.

Q: Why didn't the Oak tree win the election?

A: He didn't get the votes he was oaking for, because he was not the popular vote.

What's the difference between orphans and apples?

Apples get picked.

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? One dead baby nailed to ten trees.

What kind of tree can you High-Five?

A palm tree.

What is a fun game for an emo kid?

Tug-o-war with a tree.

I don't trust trees...they look shady.

What is the best way to make a leaf?

Go down, back around, and stir up a tree. Make it spin, watch again. Oven baking, ding, we're done!

How to make the kissing in a tree recognizable: me and you k.i.s.s.i.n.g., tree sitting, wedding, love, then comes love, then comes baby in the carriage, then hate comes, divorce and purse.

FEW!!!!!!!

Hey, join me. I be near the tree. Bring things to.

Alright, I'm gonna make like a tree and leaf.

*****You have to leave right after you tell this joke.****

I like pepper.

A treatment joke.

What did the tree say when spring finally arrived?

"What a re-leaf."

"Tibia" honestly, I think the reason I’m "bonely" is because you guys don’t find my jokes "humerus."

Maybe if I played the trombone it would get people’s attention, but "tibia" honest I can’t be bothered, so just look at my "BONE-zai" tree, although my brother doesn’t really like that one, so how about a "S-pine" tree?

What did the tree say to the kid with a bike? "Take a hike!"