Treat jokes
What do ghosts put on their bagels 馃ク?
Scream Cheese 馃槺.
The bible says to love your neighbors as you love yourself.
So I treat everyone like garbage.
What do you get when you are hungry? A dog to eat.
So, me and my friend dressed as dead people for Halloween. The only difference in the costume was that he was actually dead.
Wanted to get the scoop on history of ice cream, so I went to Sunday school.
What is the sun's favorite chocolate bar?
A Milky Way 馃槺
What do rats like on their birthday? Mice cream and cake.
Yo mama so ugly that on Halloween she didn't get candy.
I entered Kian's house. At the top of the stair, I was greeted by my greatest fantasy, JOHN. He said in a manly tone, "Hello there." I walked slowly up the stairs and greeted him back. As I walked past his room, I felt uneasy. I walked into Kian's room to find no one. I turned around and gasped. John is standing there, a bulge had appeared and poked me as he got nearer. He pushed me onto Kian's bed. The bed was that bad it broke as I fell onto it. John says, "A broken bed is nothing to worry about." I look up at him in disbelief, he's more masculine than I thought. He thrust himself onto me, his crotch area sticky to the touch. He then ripped a fart as he bent over, at this point I knew it was too late John, the fart he ripped (sticky to the touch) had me so in shock I wasn't ready for what was next, he picked and jumped on my head ripping the most monstrous, enormous, deadly, sticky to the touch fart I'd ever seen, it knocked me out. I awoke to find I was in the WALLS. I looked out to find I was in the glory hole, my worst nightmare had become reality, I fully understood my purpose in life was to the holy glory hole, I heard "GRANDAD CAN I GET SOME V-BUCK" I then knew I was in for some Kian treats.
The end
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Hi.
Where are you not allowed to go trick or treating as a ghost?
Harlem, New York.
Why did the little girl's ice cream melt? She was on fire.
A pedophile brings his eight-year-old daughter to the doctor's office. The doctor asked her if she would like some candy? Her father replies, "Please, no more candy for her. I gave her enough today."
I'm treated like God when I'm home, I'm usually ignored until someone wants something.
I went trick or treating this year with friends. Good thing I dressed as a zombie...
no one could tell that it was their blood.
How to treat someone who鈥檚 lesbian, gay, queer, transgender or bisexual?
The same way that you would treat anybody else, you homophobic bastard.
My wife left me for an Indian guy. I know he's going to treat her well, I heard they worship cows.
My girlfriend treats me like God. -- She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.