Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?
Me: Look at the stars in the sky.
Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?
Me: No, it’s a waste of time.
Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.
Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.
Why aren't apple chargers called apple juice? Also, how do you throw away trash cans?
How many children can you fit in a box?
Maybe five if you have a trash compactor.
I love trash bags because they remind me of my heart... black.
"Can I throw you away? You look like my trash can. Oh, wait, you *are* my trash can."
What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?
...
I'm still trying to think of an answer.
I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
My mom told me to recycle the trash. I guess I’m taking you for another bike ride!
Women say men are trash.
Yet men made the phone, laptops, computer and electrical hardware she uses to say men are trash, never mind the electricity she uses to power those devices...
Women be like men are trash, [but] forgets women raised those men.
Women say their baby daddies are trash like... woman, didn't he impregnate you and didn't he win your heart? I mean, he's not trash, you are!
My mum told me to take out the trash, but I couldn’t find you.
wheres your mom
in the bin
It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.
I called my mom on Alexa, and she told me, "Please take out the trash." I said, "But I can't, you're not here."
I'm still not sure how I'm not in jail or have been fined for littering. When I was born, I was born in a hospital trash can, therefore making me a literal piece of trash. That being said, any time I'm out in public, I'm a piece of litter.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. When I'm taking out the trash, I remember you.
I would roast you, but I'm not supposed to burn trash.
They say one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. That’s why orphanages exist!
One day I caught my sister talking to my girlfriend, and she said, "You never told me you're lesbian." I said, "No, not at all." My girlfriend asked, "Why did you not tell her?" and I said, "Because every time I bring a girl home, I hear too much noise in her room, and I never get the chance to kiss them because she's cleaning the trash." She said, "Yeah, the trash is her junk."
