So I had a friend who was an orphan, and he said, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, just reminding you." I then said, "Hey, how's your parents?" I never saw him after that.
The whole reason he is dead is because he kept hitting "Remind me later" on his Windows Updates.
The wife said, "Honey! Do you like my new teeth?"
The husband replied, "They remind me of stars, darling!"
"Yellow and far apart."
Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?
I was thinking about you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.
Why do gay men like the filling in Hostess Twinkies?
It reminds them of cum. 😋 😍 😏 😜
School reminds me of a penis. It's long and hard unless you're Asian.
Why do orphans hate the color black? Because it reminds them of their dark history.
Why don't feminists like to eat hotdogs? Because they remind them of men's dicks.
I once had a cat that reminded me of Doug Ford.
Fat, mean, and probably inbred.
The Twin Towers remind me of an emote... bing, bang, boom.
So little Susie came home and said, "Mom, little Johnny showed me his pecker."
And her mom said, "WHAT?!"
And little Susie was like, "Yeah, it reminded me of a peanut." Her mom said, "Oh, because it was so small?"
Susie said, "No, because it tasted salty."
My boyfriend accused me of cheating. I told him he reminded me of my girlfriend.
When you hear your mom’s car pull in the driveway and you remember that she told you to take the chicken out of the freezer 7 hours ago.
Why do orphans hate geometry? Cuz it reminds them that their parents are poley-gone.
My bumper sticker says: "👋FORMER BABY ON BOARD."
My sister reminds me of 911: one moan of "OMG" got everyone's attention.
Hey, guys! Just a quick reminder to spread kindness today. And treat others how you want to be treated! Rate your day scale of 1-10 in the comments below. Mine was about a 7. Also, can you guys please comment what you guys want me to cover in these little messages? Sometimes it's hard to tell if you guys like that I'm doing this kind of stuff or not.
I told an orphan that I watch Family Guy, and he seemed disappointed, so I reminded him that he has no family.
And the winner of the Tour de France is awarded, as ever, with the yellow jersey.
To remind him what color his piss is meant to be.
